I used to think it was cool to be quiet and keep to myself, but now I’m worried that my neighbors will believe that I’m a serial killer.
— (via fwps)
Unexpected Sharks
No one expects the sharks!
Their chief weapon is surprise. Surprise and fear …
(Apologies to both Monty, and his Python).
I told my teacher I couldn’t turn in an online assignment because the internet was down. (I just wasn’t finished.) But I sent her an email saying this, so she called me out on my bullshit.
— (submitted by Sasu Techane)
I have spent more time considering what would be the coolest song to play at my funeral than I have spent on contemplating my own mortality.
— (via fwps)
She chops! She chops!
She looks like a flower, but she stings like a bee, like every girl in history, She bangs! She bangs! An old Ricky Martin song, She Bangs, tells of the power that women have. In Lizzie Borden’s case however, she chops.
With so many people in America suffering from sleep deprivation, you’d thing TV would be better at 3:30 in the morning.
— (via fwps)
Sustainability in all things!
(via xkcd: Sustainable)
I feel inadequate for not being able to perceive all 11 dimensions.
— (submitted by sing-stupidity)
